Samantha asked me last night if today would be hard for me. “Without my Valentine?” I asked… this was what she was worried about.
Chuck was not that big fan of using holidays for retail indulgence. Don’t even get me started about the Christmas battles we waged. Valentines he participated more out of a sense of obligation than enthusiasm. Chuck's brother reminded me that what actually filled my husband's heart on Valentines Day was that pitchers and catchers reported to camp. At best, one Valentines Day he brought home some cheesy heart shaped earrings purchased at Fred Meyers at the last minute. At worst, probably our first Valentine’s Day together shortly after we became engaged, when he got his one true love, his newly betrothed: NOTHING. No card, no flowers, no dinner. He never did live that down.
The kids can “Be Mine” this year. I made them popcorn balls, we’ll probably watch a movie or show tonight and eat tacos. That will work.
Chuck was not that big fan of using holidays for retail indulgence. Don’t even get me started about the Christmas battles we waged. Valentines he participated more out of a sense of obligation than enthusiasm. Chuck's brother reminded me that what actually filled my husband's heart on Valentines Day was that pitchers and catchers reported to camp. At best, one Valentines Day he brought home some cheesy heart shaped earrings purchased at Fred Meyers at the last minute. At worst, probably our first Valentine’s Day together shortly after we became engaged, when he got his one true love, his newly betrothed: NOTHING. No card, no flowers, no dinner. He never did live that down.
So when Sam asked me if I would be ok, I told her that I will dearly miss her Papa on Valentine’s Day, just like I do on all the other days. It is in fact, not the Hallmark cards I long for, but the everyday stuff. I miss cooking dinner together, talking to him about the kids, discussing politics, watching movies, traveling, listening to music, going to ballgames, sharing a beer and taking care of household chores together. I miss having a partner. I’m ok without the chocolates, flowers or last minute jewelry. I’m pretty good at getting myself presents when I need them.
The kids can “Be Mine” this year. I made them popcorn balls, we’ll probably watch a movie or show tonight and eat tacos. That will work.
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